I kind of miss this blog. It’s been so long…Facebook is about all I can handle lately, and sometimes when I think about this blog (or come back to visit, like I did tonight since I got a new comment–good luck, Cori!) it makes me a little sad for my old life. I love, love, love my new life, but I still miss the old one, you know? Anyway. I thought maybe I’d do the end of the year meme that I did for the past however many years here. Just because, well, why not.

1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?

Bought a house. Parented a toddler. Moved back to my hometown.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I don’t think I made any resolutions. For next year…well, the goal to be “good enough” was a good one, i think. I like that one.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Hmm, in 2009…Um, no? But my sister is pregnant!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
GB’s grandpa. I miss him all the time.

5. What countries did you visit?
No other countries…i missed the conference in Canada.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
More money. A tenure-track job, or at least a job that pays enough to live on.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Waylon’s first birthday. My dissertation defense.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Finishing the dissertation and defending it successfully!

9. What was your biggest failure?
Not applying for any jobs this year might not have been a good idea.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Anxiety & OCD–I need to get on a different SSRI.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

The house! And the new (new to us, 13 year old)  Subaru is pretty sweet too.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Waylon. He always rocks.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

My own.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent and diapers, again, probably. And coffee.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Finishing the dissertation. Waylon learning to walk and talk.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
God, the freaking Wiggles songs and the They Might Be Giants podcasts. Ugh. No real music, I don’t think. How sad.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
Happier; fatter; about the same, but without a rent payment to make now.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Exercising, reading for pleasure

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying. Panicking. Beating myself up for nearly everything I’m doing/not doing/not doing fast enough. (Last year’s answers still work, unfortunately.) (same answer for the past 2 years, and it still works…damn.)

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Flying to the Left Coast to see GB’s family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
With Waylon, more.

22. How many one-night stands?

Oh, no. Not a one, this year. Actually, I might have to count GB as a one-night-stand in 2008. Oh, no, that’s just too sad. (Same for 2009….Oh, how sad is that?)

23. What was your favorite TV program?
Got rid of cable, so watched everything on Netflix: True Blood, Dexter, Lost, Battlestar Galactica.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Nah. Some people who annoy me more.

25. What was the best book you read?
My dissertation. Ha!

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
That I really need to listen to more music again.

27. What did you want and get?
A PhD…almost. Finished, degree coming in March.

28. What did you want and not get?
A job.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?

God, no idea. Maybe Coraline.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 38, and had a barbecue at our new house.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Having more money and actually getting drunk one time. Oy.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?

Slovenly at best. Same clothes every day, usually covered in goo. Not good.

33. What kept you sane?
GB, as always. And Netflix. And Waylon, always.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
As always, my Johnny Depp love continues unabated.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Sadly, nothing.

36. Who did you miss?
GB’s grandpa and the east coast friends.

37. Who was the best new person you met?

Getting to know old friends again now that we live in the same town has been amazing.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.

You really can be happy anywhere.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

“Once in awhile you get shown the light in the strangest of places, if you look at it right.”

I would be shocked if anyone was still here, but I feel like this needs to be part of this blog, anyway:

Friends, I survived my defense last Friday, and I am now Dr. Luckybuzz.

Wow. Wow. Wow.

Some small random revisions and I think I can get it submitted in the next week, and then…wow. Hard to even imagine life post-dissertation.

And I miss this blog, so maybe I’ll pick it back up…

Yeah, so, I’ve all but abandoned this blog. It’s sad, kind of, because I love having this space and because it really, really reminds me of a time in my life that I miss terribly–the drinking, rock n’ roll bumper pool playing, kissing, hazy awesome years in East Coast City. Sigh. But life is good now too, and Facebook is working for the immediate stuff. Still….yeah, maybe I won’t abandon this space altogether. We’ll see.

A couple brief updates, since I’ve been getting comments on old posts:

  • Waylon is the Best. Thing. Ever. I can’t even tell you. He amazes and delights me every single day.
  • Internet Job ended with them owing me almost $6000 that I will (probably) never see. Argh. Enough about that.
  • The Advisor’s comments that implied some minor revisions of the first draft of the dissertation were…misleading. I ended up basically rewriting the entire thing. Literally: I sat down with a blank document and retyped/rewrote the whole damn thing. The second version was much, much easier, though.

And the big big news:

  • I have a defense date: October 2, less than three weeks from now. Yikes! And hooray! Should go prepare…something. Hmm.

That’s what WordPress asked me when I logged in to start this post–Remember me? If you’re on Facebook (and you know my Top Secret Identity) you know what I’ve been up to….ignoring this blog, among other things. I do love the immediacy of micro-blogging, but I have to say that it feels kind of good to be back here, rambling in my own pseudonymous space. Maybe I’ll blog a bit more this spring, if anybody’s still around.

How about some brief RBOC updates? As always, life is wildly in flux…

  • I didn’t get the job that I had the campus interview for. Which is too bad, because, damn, those were the nicest people I could imagine working with, but I’m not really sad about not having to move again right away.
  • They sent me three (THREE!) very kind, apologetic, complimentary rejection letters. They are very, very sad that they didn’t hire me. To which I say, dudes, you could have just hired me and saved the paper. But thanks.
  • Living here in Hometown has been fabulous. Last year was so solitary and insular for us–hardly any friends, place we didn’t know, incubating Waylon. This year? Total opposite. Not only are we here with my oldest friends, but through the wonders of Facebook I am now regularly seeing old friends from Hometown who I haven’t talked to in 20 years. Pretty amazing.
  • It is so freaking awesome to have a community again, I can’t even tell you.
  • But I still miss the west coast people and the east coast people.
  • I realize this is the downside of moving so freaking much…I always miss people.
  • More than that: I realized the other day that, while I have these fabulous friends all over the country, moving so much means that no one–except GB–knows the whole story of my past 20 years. I keep having to fill in pieces for people, or correcting them when they assume certain things are the same as they were 15 years ago.
  • Still: it’s awesome being here.
  • I finished a draft of the dissertation, sent it to the Advisor. He wrote back to let me know that he thinks it’s a “fabulous project,” that I’m an excellent writer (kind praise, coming from him–he’s known for his surprisingly interesting academic writing), that it’s looking good and “the end is very much in sight.” He also thinks that I should aim for a November degree instead of a June degree. The extra revisions in the meantime, he’s suggesting, will make for a much stronger project that is closer to publication-ready. I find this disappointing, but it makes sense.
  • And the end is still in sight, though I’m looking at a June 2010 commencement now.
  • I got hooked up with a job with an internet startup, providing content that specifically draws on my area of research. It pays absurdly well. I’m contracting with them right now, but it may translate to a full time or part time job in a few months. I could work 10 hours a week for them (all from home) and make more money than we’re living on this year.
  • And maybe I don’t actually want to teach, after all. This is something else I’ve been kicking around.
  • I’m back on the job market next year anyway–we’ll see how that goes. Life, as always, is up in the air. Not sure if we’ll be moving, where we’ll be working, what we’ll be doing next year.
  • Oh, and I got an article accepted for publication and an email soliciting a book chapter on my research for an edited collection, which is nice.
  • And Waylon. Waylon is amazing. Utterly, completely, “I’ve-become-one-of-those-moms” amazing. We are now trying to finagle our working plans so that both GB and I can spend as much time as possible with Waylon–this year, both of us getting to be with him all the time, is so fabulous. Fortunately neither GB nor I is especially ambitious, when it comes right down to it. Because seriously? We’ve got our priorities lined up, and right now (well, always), family is right up at the top of that.  So yeah. We’re just enjoying Waylon and life and friends. And worrying about the future. And waiting for spring.
  • You know I’ve gotta do it…can you believe how much hair he has now?

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I did this last year, and the year before, so why not, huh?

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Had a baby, interviewed for jobs at Big Damn Conference, had my first campus interview for a TT job

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My resolution for 2008 was to be adequate, and I think I did okay at that. :)

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Me! And my one School Friend, whose adorable son is 10 days older than Waylon. And another friend, whose adorable daughter is a few weeks younger than Waylon.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No (*knocking wood vigorously*)

5. What countries did you visit?
No other countries–a few U.S. states.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
The PhD. And enough money to live on. And a house of our own. And some idea where we’ll be living for more than a few months.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
Well, having Waylon obviously influences all the answers for this year…so June 3, 2008 (Waylon’s birthday) would be the stand-out date.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Having Waylon, and raising him this far. Hardest and best thing I’ve ever done. And getting 5 interviews at Big Damn Conference was nice, too.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Still haven’t finished the dissertation. And I really did bomb about 3 of my 5 interviews.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
Postpartum depression–that was scary. And postpartum hyperthyroidism–also disturbing and scary.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I don’t know! We haven’t bought much that’s not baby-related.


12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Waylon, of course! And the people of the U.S., for electing Obama.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

McCain/Palin.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Rent and diapers. And moving. Oh, god, the moving.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Waylon, duh.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
A few: the Avett Brothers’ “Die Die Die” and Van Morrison’s Tupelo Honey (the whole album) were big for me this year.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
happier, for sure; thinner, I think (I was just starting my 2nd trimester this time last year); poorer, since GB’s not working, but our expenses are less.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Camping, seeing friends

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Worrying. Panicking. Beating myself up for nearly everything I’m doing/not doing/not doing fast enough. (Last year’s answers still work, unfortunately)

20. How will you be spending Christmas?
Spent it with GB and Waylon, visiting my sister, BIL, and adorable nephew and my mom.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
I fell completely, madly, head-over-heels in love with Waylon. At the risk of sounding like every first-time mom everywhere,  I had No. Freaking. Idea. how much I could love someone.
22. How many one-night stands?

Oh, no. Not a one, this year. Actually, I might have to count GB as a one-night-stand in 2008. Oh, no, that’s just too sad.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
So many this year. We watched Dexter and True Blood (but lost cable before the end of the season for both); loved the Wire on DVD.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

Sarah Palin, maybe.

25. What was the best book you read?
I’m reading The No-Cry Sleep Solution right now. Let’s move on.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Seeing the Avett Brothers live was all kinds of good.

27. What did you want and get?
Waylon.

28. What did you want and not get?
A PhD.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?

No idea, but here’s a tip: if you find yourself, on Christmas Eve, selecting a movie to watch with your sister, brother in law, and super-conservative evangelical Christian mom? You might want to make sure it doesn’t have a scene involving a sex chair and a giant dildo.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 37, and spent the day having what I thought were awful panic attacks, but turned out to be the postpartum hyperthyroid. Ugh.

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Finishing the goddamn diss.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

I completely gave up.

33. What kept you sane?
GB, as always. And Netflix.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
As always, my Johnny Depp love continues unabated. But I did begin my Keith Olbermann love this year.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I was completely obsessed by the election.

36. Who did you miss?
My sisters, Skycat and the Yogini, and my Hometown Women (there are more of them, but they don’t all have blogs…or at least, they won’t tell me about them). (Same as last year, but we moved closer to the Hometown women and Skycat and the Yogini…now I’ve been missing the East Coast City friends.)

37. Who was the best new person you met?

Waylon. :)

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38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

Same as last year: moving sucks.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

GB suggested “the long and winding road,” and that works for me. I feel like I could do better with this last one but Waylon is about to wake up…

I’m all about the Facebook micro-blogging these days (and even that is more than I can handle). I’ll be back here again someday, I promise…

In the meantime, a quick recap: the campus interview went really well, actually, and I had a really good time (even though GB and Waylon ended up not coming with me at the VERY last minute for reasons too complicated to explain right now, and let me tell you, being away from Waylon overnight? Not something I, or my boobs, want to repeat. And yes, I had a pump, for what it was worth); now I have to wait until after the beginning of January to hear anything from them….So we’ll see how that goes; and we are in our new apartment, finally, and starting to get settled a bit; and I have yet to start work on the dissertation again, and feeling stressed about that; and Waylon and I are sick AGAIN.

And here is a meme, which is easier: (via Anastasia, I think)

1. Started my own blog
2. Slept under the stars - I miss camping.
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower – Oh, the Leonids. How I love them.
6. Given more than I can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland/world – and I like it.
8. Climbed a mountain- okay, a hill, but it felt like a mountain.
9. Held a praying mantis – are you kidding me? Have you SEEN one of those things up close? Brrr.
10. Sung a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris – and interestingly, despite other people’s wonderful experiences there, I have no desire to whatsoever.
13. Watched lightening at sea
14. Taught myself an art from scratch – I’m not sure what this even means…
15. Adopted a child – not yet, but we will adopt #2
16. Had food poisoning Yes, but I’m pretty sure it was psychosomatic. Still threw up for 14+ hours, though.
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown my own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France – didn’t I just say I haven’t been to Paris? What’s with the Francophile meme?
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitchhiked - well, I was in the Sunset in San Francisco once and needed to get to the Haight, and the two friends I was with and I stuck out our thumbs, mostly in jest, and a truck full of hippies delivering organic produce picked us up and drove us the mile to the Haight. So, I guess, yeah.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill – isn’t this just calling in drunk?
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice – dude, enough with the European questions already
29. Seen a total eclipse – awesome.
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset – from both sides–still up and getting up.
31. Hit a home run – uh, not so much, me.
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of my ancestors - well, the WASP side–I’ve been to England. Not so much the middle eastern side, unfortunately.
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught myself a new language – taught myself, not so much. I’ve learned French (which I can still read well and speak badly); German (enough to pass a proficiency exam, though i no exactly no German now); and Sanskrit (which I absolutely do not know now, but it was fun to learn). I’ve tried to teach myself Farsi for years, with no luck.
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied – maybe soon.
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David – omg, enough. there’s more to life than the art I haven’t seen in person.
41. Sung karaoke – much to my sobered-up embarrassment. Note to self: the Goo Goo Dolls’ “Name” is not a fun karaoke song, especially if you try to do it as a drunken duet, and do not know any of the words.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had my portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris – this is getting tiresome
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling – no, but I’d like to.
52. Kissed in the rain – aw, yeah.
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie – no, but my sister is a hilariously overacting extra in this movie. Oh, and I was in a couple of my friend’s student films, actually; in one, I played “the woman obsessed with Blavatsky“; I sat in a garden chain-smoking and madly flipping through “Isis Unveiled.” Good times.
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class – exactly one.
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen – “To Serve Man” is a cookbook!!!!!
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching – never have, but I would still love to
63. Got flowers for no reason- yep, and gave them for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. – no, but I will, I swear. I’m O negative. I have no excuse.
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy – Muffin, the black stuffed cat.
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades -again, no, but would love to
75. Been fired from a job – yes, at a record store, of all places
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London – that would be time I would never get back.
77. Broken a bone
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle – I’ve been on a motorcycle twice and was petrified both times. Never again.
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person – when I was about 6. Need to see it again as an adult.
80. Published a book — eventually the dissertation?
81. Visited the Vatican – you know, a lot of exciting things happen at home, too.
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had my picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury – no, despite being called for jury duty at least 4 times
91. Met someone famous – Arlo Guthrie, and I can’t think of anyone else
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one – knocking wood and moving on
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake – I think so, but I was about 5
97. Been involved in a law suit - Capital One sued me, but you know, they sue everyone.
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee
100. Ridden an elephant

(those of you on Facebook got the moment-by-moment version of this…you lucky dogs)

  • August 31: postpartum hyperthyroid sets in (on my birthday), making me think I’m having a 5-day-long panic attack. No fun. Takes a couple weeks to get my medication (was previously hypothyroid) sorted out. Spend several weeks feeling panicky and stressed.
  • September: we suddenly decide–surprise!–let’s move back to HomeState. We give notice on the apartment (to be out Oct. 11) and start packing. Again. September is All Packing All the Time. Oh, except for the putting together and submitting of 12 job applications.
  • October 10: guys we’ve never met come and put all of our earthly belongings on a truck. Will we ever see it again? (This stuff *may* be being delivered today, November 28. My fingers are crossed.)
  • October 10: we finish cleaning the now-empty apartment and drive 3 hours to GB’s parents’ house with 2 cats (2 in in-laws’ cars) and baby.
  • October 10-21: staying with GB’s parents/grandparents. ‘Nuff said.
  • October 20: GB leaves with the 4 cats to drive the 2400 miles to HomeState.
  • October 21: Waylon and I fly to HomeState, to my sister’s house (where my mom also lives).
  • October 21: GB arrives safely in HomeState, thank goodness.
  • October 23: we drive up to Hometown (3 hours) to see friends and look at apartments.
  • October 24: back to my sister’s/mom’s house in Capital City.
  • October 24-31: staying at my sister’s. My dad is also in town, and my mom lives there, so it’s a very full house. My sister and her husband (and their adorable son) are saints who never once say, “Uh, so, you’ve been here awhile, huh?”
  • October 24-31: prep for 5 interviews upcoming at Big Damn Conference. Oh, and Waylon and I both get sick. Waylon’s first cold! Good times.
  • October 31: drive 6 hours with GB and Waylon to Big Damn Conference (have I mentioned that Waylon DOES NOT like to be in the car?)
  • October 31-November 3: Big Damn Conference. I have 5 interviews: 2 on Saturday, 2 on Sunday, 1 on Monday. I completely lose my voice and can’t talk at all, starting on Friday night. 5 interviews completed in a breathy whisper. 2 go all right; 1 is not so bad; 2 are miserable, horrifying experiences.
  • November 3: drive 6 hours back to Capital City
  • November 4: election stress. Yes we can! Whoohooo!
  • November 4-10: still staying with my sister’s family. Did I mention she’s a saint?
  • November 10: drive 3 hours to Hometown with 4 cats, baby, and 2 adults in the car. Move into Skycat and the Yogini’s house, which they have-just that morning-vacated for 2 months. A few hours after we get in, GB drives 1 1/2 hours each way to pick up his mom at the airport.
  • November 10-19: GB’s mom is here with us. My mom comes up for 3 days too. OMG Moms overload. We find an apartment in the upstairs apartment at Crazy? or Just Eccentric? Landlady’s house. I get a call that I have a campus interview at Southern State University, at the end of this month. Yippee! I mean, oh my god.
  • November 19-28: frantic preparation ensues. Job talk written (and not yet practiced); 3 sample syllabi prepared; school madly researched (not enough, more to do today); faculty publications read (mostly, more to skim); interview questions/answers prepped (not even started). The Yogini comes back home to knit for three days, and I cannot resist having meals and hanging out with her. I do not regret Yogini time, but I am still woefully unprepared.
  • November 28: our stuff is supposed to arrive on the truck today. Will it or won’t it? Too early to tell, but if it does, there goes today, as we try to get it all moved into our new apartment.
  • November 30: GB flies to Southern State at noon. Waylon and I follow on a separate flight 4 hours later. I am scheduled to have dinner with faculty at 7pm.
  • December 1: day-long campus visit: interviews and meals with faculty, students, and administration, and my (first ever! O.M.F.G.) job talk (at 2pm). GB, Waylon and I all fly back home (together!) at 7pm.
  • December 2: we actually move into our new place.
  • December 3: we will be (probably) in our new apartment. I will sleep for approximately a week.

Dudes. Seriously. I haven’t relaxed since mid-August. I need a break.

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