the ongoing soap opera of my life


Seriously. Having a nephew who’s a year and half older than our kid? Brilliant.

My mom got here today–she’s here until Sunday. She brought us a swing (the one we wanted, which happened to be the one my sister also picked out), a carseat (secondhand, but in perfect condition), and a bunch more clothes. Awesome. And it’s good to see her. I hope I can get a grip on my irritability and just be nice, dammit.

And tomorrow is our big ultrasound! Here’s hoping we get confirmation on the sex, and that the baby has all the parts he’s supposed to have, and nothing extra.  Pictures will, undoubtedly, follow.

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The saga continues….

Last night was kind of a bust in the Bad Idea department…

Although I did kind of freak out at one point when he said (to me), “You’re a Bad Influence. I’m going to call you B.I.” (And I was all, OMG!!!! HE READ MY BLOG!!! But I’m positive he has no idea what a “blog” is, unless it’s some odd species of local flora, so no worries, I think…just odd coincidence.)

But I might get another chance later tonight…

In the meantime, GB and I have been up since 6am packing, mailing boxes, donating things to the local thrift store, and generally being about-to-move maniacs. Good times.

I am sleepy. Very, very sleepy. And freaking exhausted. But apparently there will be a few beers at Jason’s tonight and…well, as GB reminded me last night, “If you’re going to make another move on Bad Idea, you need to be a lot more obvious about it.” So let’s see how that goes, shall we?

Oy. Let’s see if I can stay awake long enough to try.

This is what I did today:

My first beach trip of the year! Whooohoo! Those feet belong to me and GB…you can’t see Jason’s, Bad Idea’s, or Bad Idea’s Borrowed Dog’s feet in this picture, but they were there, too. I like beach.

Sorry to be so quiet in blogland lately. I will totally take on MaggieMay’s tag-challenge, aaaaany minute now…..

I don’t even know why I haven’t been blogging or commenting lately. Well–I haven’t been working, either, and maybe that’s keeping me from doing much on the computer. I’ve been distracted by a bunch of things:

  • we’re working on the New Plan, and it’s brought my OCD out in full force; I’m not doing a very good job of thinking about much else, and I’m just generally wandering the internets, following my OCD urges.
  • this whole moving thing–it’s stressing me out. Not only are we not ready to move (not packed at all, really, and with a house full of crap that needs to be gotten rid of)–we’re also dealing with the whole no-jobs, no-place-to-live (well, with GB’s parents, but that really has to be temporary), what-the-fuck-will-we-do thing. A little stressful.
  • And leaving here is stressing me out, too. Time is getting short, and everyone is getting a little twitchy and sad (by “everyone” I mean me, and Jason, and Bad Idea, and IB/DM. There’s a *LOT* of not-talking-about-it going on.)
  • And I haven’t felt much like drinking lately, which is too bad, because part of me wants to be drunk all this month.
  • Although, Thursday night I got painfully, incredibly, outstandingly drunk with Bad Idea, went back to his house, and proceeded to puke All. The fuck. Over.
  • That? Is not hot.
  • Bad Idea, however–while still a bad idea–is also a freaking prince. He kindly and tactfully cleaned up after me, shielded me from his roommate’s ire, and walked me safely to a cab (at 4:30am). And, in response to my many, many apologies, responded only: “It happens to everyone. And the kissing part earlier was fun.”
  • What kissing part? There was kissing?!
  • Apparently there was kissing, and apparently I had fun. Damn. I’m sorry I missed it.
  • Have I mentioned that I really have not been drinking lately, and I seem to have absolutely no tolerance left at ALL?
  • Moreover, why am I telling you all this, internet friends? After a silence this long, I return with stories of drunken sickness? That’s just bad form.
  • Sorry.
  • I think the Aphrodisiac Dinner with Bad Idea is still on, in a couple weeks. Wish me luck. I might need it.
  • See, maybe it’s better if I just maintain a little silence here for a while….
  • We’re not leaving here, now, until the end of July. Which feels like a really great idea; I wasn’t ready to be out of here quite that soon.
  • That gives me almost three more weeks to hang out here in the bittersweet limbo of the About-to-Move.
  • And three more weeks for things with Bad Idea to come to some kind of…resolution? Ha!
  • We–Bad Idea and I–have a plan. It involves a lobster and oyster dinner. I’ve never had any kind of seafood besides, you know, canned tuna. Bad Idea has offered to teach me all about good seafood before I leave here.
  • Bad Idea has also suggested that lobster dinners frequently lead to nakedness.
  • I’m down with that.
  • But.
  • (that was the one about how Other Things that I can’t talk about might lead to a bit of a complication around that planned dinner)
  • (see why I haven’t been blogging lately? who can blog with this many things that can’t be said?)
  • (the things I’m not blogging are good things, potentially, but are extremely anxiety-provoking, as well…but they’re not BAD unbloggable things)
  • Right. Anyway. The Bay Area is still the plan, but I don’t know how soon we can get there. GB really needs to get some kind of job right quick.
  • Because I am not so down with living with his parents and grandparents indefinitely.
  • I’ve been starting to sell off some of the decent furniture, so the place is starting to clear out a little. Which is nice.
  • We haven’t really packed much of anything, though.
  • I’ll have plenty of packing time while GB is off on the West Coast for a week next month taking the Bar.
  • Oh yeah, that’s an update: GB is flying out to take the Bar, then flying back, THEN we’re driving the cats across the country. That’s why we have more time here.
  • My big (older, that is) sister is coming to visit! Finally! For four days! And she gets here on THURSDAY!!!! OMGPONIESSS!!!111!! I miss the hell outta her and I haven’t seen her in a freaking YEAR (since the wedding, actually) and I am actually giddy with excitement about her visiting. Seriously. I’m, like, 12 years old right now, and planning how I’m going to get her to stay up all night talking and drinking Bailey’s Irish Cream on the rocks with me.

The “Bad Idea is making it really hard to leave here” Edition.*

  1. Gauzy Dress in the Sun – Richard Buckner
  2. I Don’t Think So – Dinosaur Jr.
  3. Get Me (acoustic) – Dinosaur Jr.
  4. Give Me Love – George Harrison
  5. Uncle John’s Band – Grateful Dead
  6. Star Star – Rolling Stones (funny, because I just recently played this for Bad Idea, who had somehow never heard it)
  7. Little Triggers – Elvis Costello
  8. Fell In Love with a Girl – White Stripes
  9. Carry That Weight – Beatles
  10. C-C-C-Cinnamon Lips – OK Go

*I want to say more about this, and about my last (too-ambiguous) post about this stuff….but I haven’t felt much like actually talking about it. Let’s just say, for now, that I’m enjoying Bad Idea’s company, and it’s clear that’s mutual, and The Crush continues. Maybe more to follow…I’m just emotional about the Moving Again today. And this was a PERFECT random 10 for it.

We went out last night for IB/DM’s birthday bonanza: bowling, drinking, and cupcakes, followed by more drinking.

(Happy birthday, IB/DM!)

I knew that I was having some financial issues, so the day before the birthday bonanza I transferred some money from my (mom-funded, and intended to help with the Impending Cross-Country Move) savings to checking, so I’d have enough cash to do a little birthday drinking.

You can imagine my surprise, then, when not one, but TWO differents ATMs informed that they considered my funds insufficient.

(You see that this is going nowhere good, right?)

Yeah. Got up today, checked my bank balance (after taking 1/2 a Klonopin–seriously good call there, Luckybuzz!), and learned that a purchase had been made on my card yesterday for $145 at a place called skinstore.com. Friends, I don’t have to tell you that I’ve never heard of this place, right? (Or that a random $145 out of my account would leave me overdrawn?)

So. The very, very nice CSR at skinstore.com had the information I needed. Apparently, “I” placed an online order for $145 for a purchase of…

Rodial Tummy Tuck: “a non-invasive alternative to liposuction and abdominoplasty.”

(I first heard this as “Rodeo Tummy Tuck,” when she said it on the phone, and I really prefer that–If I’m going to be the victim of identity theft, at least “I’m” buying cool-sounding products.)

But, friends, here’s the thing. The order was placed on my credit card, by someone who knew my name. It’s like this: my real, full name is Luck Y. Buzz, and that’s the name on my ATM/debit card. I don’t use my first name, so I go by Y. Buzz–and that’s the name on the credit card order. Though not the name of the person placing the order…which the CSR was kind enough to provide to me. So I know the name–and the email address–of the jackass who stole my card number and placed an order online for the freaking RODEO TUMMY TUCK.

Weirder yet, they had my correct billing address, but the shipping address was the same.  So the Rodeo Tummy Tuck? Being shipped TO ME.

OMGWTF??? I asked the CSR, “Do you think someone is trying to send me a message?” I was kidding, but she paused and said thoughtfully, “Maybe. That’s disgusting. You’re very calm…I’d be freaking out if I were you.”

(Hooray for the early-Klonopin decision!)

Anyway–by some stroke of luck the Rodeo Tummy  Tuck is out of stock (of *course* it is), so they were able to cancel the order. Which is good, because my bank’s response was something along the lines of “Oh…dude. Huh. We’ll send you a new card.” Which is So. Not. the reassuring way to deal with identity theft.

So, I have the name and email address of the Jackass Supreme who purchased the Rodeo Tummy Tuck with my own money and had it sent to me. Friends…what do I do with THAT information? Suggestions welcome.

Yeah, did you like how I slipped that news in there with the fellowship crap?

(And I do appreciate all the fellowship-committee-hating on my behalf. I really didn’t think that my project would be right for this fellowship–I’m still grumpier about not getting the other one. But whatever. I’m trying to be over it. But y’all feel free to continue committee-hating for me.)

Yeah, so, I think we’re moving back to California. I need to be closer to the BPAL lab.

Okay, there are other reasons, too. But we’re thinking probably SoCal right now, for the family and jobs…then maybe SF sometime in the future. Yeah. We relocate a lot. It’s what we do.

Well, GB is about to graduate from law school, and we started talking the other day about how he really, really doesn’t want to get a job here…..we’ve both always said we’d love to be back in California someday. So we figured…well, technically I’ll just be writing and trying to finish the dissertation next year. Yeah, I have no funding, but it’s not like I have jobs lined up here, either….so I can write pretty much anywhere, and either take out another buttload of loans or pick up some other kind of teaching somewhere (though I’m leaning toward the ever-increasing-debt). And that way GB can try to find his job out there, and then….well, we’ll figure out my job search as we go.

That’s the plan. Yeah. It is *TOO* a plan, it just doesn’t sound like one yet. It will. At some point, this will all start to be more plan-like and less terrifying. This’ll be my third move across the country, and I’m pretty sure they all started out this terrifying, before they turned into plans. Or so I keep telling myself…

(Hey Trixie and G-Love: y’all have any vacancies in your building?)

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