September 2005

Yesterday was super-long and exhausting, but productive. Turns out I’ll be doing two sections in the same class. Clearly, the time-management gods are smiling on me, because this means I’ll actually have time to get my prospectus done. Hopefully really freakin’ soon. Anyway–overall, this looks to be a much better semester than I thought it would be. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Saw this at the Little Professor–the “100 most frequently challenged books of 1990-2000“, in honor of Banned Books Week. The ones I’ve read are in bold type–only 28 that I remember reading, though during the binge-reading phases of my early adolescence it’s hard to say what-all I consumed.

  1. Scary Stories (Series) by Alvin Schwartz
  2. Daddy’s Roommate by Michael Willhoite
  3. I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou
  4. The Chocolate War by Robert Cormier
  5. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
  6. Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck
  7. Harry Potter (Series) by J.K. Rowling
  8. Forever by Judy Blume
  9. Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
  10. Alice (Series) by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor
  11. Heather Has Two Mommies by Leslea Newman
  12. My Brother Sam is Dead by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier
  13. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
  14. The Giver by Lois Lowry
  15. It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris
  16. Goosebumps (Series) by R.L. Stine
  17. A Day No Pigs Would Die by Robert Newton Peck
  18. The Color Purple by Alice Walker
  19. Sex by Madonna
  20. Earth’s Children (Series) by Jean M. Auel
  21. The Great Gilly Hopkins by Katherine Paterson
  22. A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle
  23. Go Ask Alice by Anonymous
  24. Fallen Angels by Walter Dean Myers
  25. In the Night Kitchen by Maurice Sendak
  26. The Stupids (Series) by Harry Allard
  27. The Witches by Roald Dahl
  28. The New Joy of Gay Sex by Charles Silverstein
  29. Anastasia Krupnik (Series) by Lois Lowry
  30. The Goats by Brock Cole
  31. Kaffir Boy by Mark Mathabane
  32. Blubber by Judy Blume
  33. Killing Mr. Griffin by Lois Duncan
  34. Halloween ABC by Eve Merriam
  35. We All Fall Down by Robert Cormier
  36. Final Exit by Derek Humphry
  37. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood
  38. Julie of the Wolves by Jean Craighead George
  39. The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison
  40. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Girls: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Daughters by Lynda Madaras
  41. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
  42. Beloved by Toni Morrison
  43. The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton
  44. The Pigman by Paul Zindel
  45. Bumps in the Night by Harry Allard
  46. Deenie by Judy Blume
  47. Flowers for Algernon by Daniel Keyes
  48. Annie on my Mind by Nancy Garden
  49. The Boy Who Lost His Face by Louis Sachar
  50. Cross Your Fingers, Spit in Your Hat by Alvin Schwartz
  51. A Light in the Attic by Shel Silverstein
  52. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  53. Sleeping Beauty Trilogy by A.N. Roquelaure (Anne Rice)
  54. Asking About Sex and Growing Up by Joanna Cole
  55. Cujo by Stephen King
  56. James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl
  57. The Anarchist Cookbook by William Powell
  58. Boys and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
  59. Ordinary People by Judith Guest
  60. American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis
  61. What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys: A Growing-Up Guide for Parents & Sons by Lynda Madaras
  62. Are You There, God? It’s Me, Margaret by Judy Blume
  63. Crazy Lady by Jane Conly
  64. Athletic Shorts by Chris Crutcher
  65. Fade by Robert Cormier
  66. Guess What? by Mem Fox
  67. The House of Spirits by Isabel Allende
  68. The Face on the Milk Carton by Caroline Cooney
  69. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
  70. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
  71. Native Son by Richard Wright
  72. Women on Top: How Real Life Has Changed Women’s Fantasies by Nancy Friday
  73. Curses, Hexes and Spells by Daniel Cohen
  74. Jack by A.M. Homes
  75. Bless Me, Ultima by Rudolfo A. Anaya
  76. Where Did I Come From? by Peter Mayle
  77. Carrie by Stephen King
  78. Tiger Eyes by Judy Blume
  79. On My Honor by Marion Dane Bauer
  80. Arizona Kid by Ron Koertge
  81. Family Secrets by Norma Klein
  82. Mommy Laid An Egg by Babette Cole
  83. The Dead Zone by Stephen King
  84. The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain
  85. Song of Solomon by Toni Morrison
  86. Always Running by Luis Rodriguez
  87. Private Parts by Howard Stern
  88. Where’s Waldo? by Martin Hanford
  89. Summer of My German Soldier by Bette Greene
  90. Little Black Sambo by Helen Bannerman
  91. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
  92. Running Loose by Chris Crutcher
  93. Sex Education by Jenny Davis
  94. The Drowning of Stephen Jones by Bette Greene
  95. Girls and Sex by Wardell Pomeroy
  96. How to Eat Fried Worms by Thomas Rockwell
  97. View from the Cherry Tree by Willo Davis Roberts
  98. The Headless Cupid by Zilpha Keatley Snyder
  99. The Terrorist by Caroline Cooney
  100. Jump Ship to Freedom by James Lincoln Collier and Christopher Collier

In related news, I am these:

You Are Bold Red Boots

You like to put your most outrageous foot forward!

What Kind of Boots Are You?

I do love boots. I almost never wear them, but I actually own five or six pairs (another fact that would surprise my friends: despite the fact that I wear the same pair of shoes almost every single day, I own about 30 pairs of shoes. It’s–literally–a closet fetish). I like these red ones very much, I have to say.


Hold on, I’m going to go make myself a drink.

Okay, I’m back. Vanilla vodka and flat Coke, but I haven’t had a drink in a while, and it’s close enough for rock ‘n’ roll. (Thanks to BrightStar for what may become my catchphrase.)

So I’m wasting time tonight, feeling the pull of the semester beginning but not feeling entirely ready to be pulled into it. High procrastination mode. So anyway, I was over at RussianViolets‘ and saw that she’d done the “7 things that surprise my friends” list. Now, I’ve seen this around a bit in the past couple days, and while I generally jump on this kind of thing, I obviously haven’t. It just seems a little…vulnerable. But whatever. I’m here, I’m wasting time, so I’ll give it a shot. I’m not promising anything.

OK. Seven things about me that surprise my friends:

1) Like RussianViolets, Profgrrrrl, and Adjunct Kait, I was a painfully shy child. That phrase, “painfully shy”? It’s really not just a figure of speech. But here’s the part that my friends all seem to find surprising: I’m a painfully shy adult as well. Like most of us introverts who’ve chosen semi-extroverted jobs, though, I’ve learned to hide it pretty well, and most people who’ve met me in the past 10 years would say I’m pretty outgoing, I think. That is so, so, so not true.

2) I’m almost positive that whenever anyone says complimentary things about my appearance, personality, or actions (really anything not related to my brain), they’re just being polite.
2a) I don’t really believe anyone is *that* polite, but I might be *that* fucked up.

3) I got married when I was 16. This floors ’em all. FYI: No, not arranged, though my Middle Eastern father was a factor; yes, parental consent; 7 years older; for 3 years, followed by a very amicable dissolution; yes, big huge fancy long-dress wedding; no regrets, since that’s where I learned nearly everything I love about rock ‘n roll.

4) I was afraid of the dark until I was almost 12. This may have helped with my current superhero-like ability to sleep in absolutely any lighting.

5) I absolutely hate having intellectual debates about my field. My standby line: If you want to have this conversation, you need to pay me.

6) Neither I nor any living person in my family (besides my father) knows my father’s real age, and it’s likely we never will.

7) I am a big, huge, sappy softie, but hardly anyone breaks through my hard candy shell to figure that out. This is true emotionally, of course, but it’s extra-true physically. I will never make the first move to hug, cuddle, or touch my friends, so just go ahead and do it already.

Ooh, not drinking in a while + drinking fast while blogging = I feel lovely. That was actually kind of cathartic. Think I’ll have another drink and call it a (completely unproductive) night.

I’m not sure where I first heard of it (I suspect it was over at the Little Professor‘s), but I finally checked it out tonight and the verdict is in: I. Love. LibraryThing. I can’t stop adding books. I think I’m actually going to have to put the super-cool blog widget on here, even. Though my sidebar is getting hella unwieldy, as those kids in California would say have said 15 years ago.

What else is new around these parts….well, part one of the Scorsese bio of Dylan is on tonight (check your local PBS listings). Not sure yet if I’m planning to watch it or just record it now and watch it when I’m more motivated (and when I have some wine). Feeling like I really should do some work tonight, but damn…I’ve got a 10 hour day tomorrow, including the first meeting of Class-I-Might-Be-Teaching, and I’m psyched to finally have my room back (though it was nice to see GB’s mom, I’ve been displaced for five days), and I’m getting demon cramps. Huh. Think I just talked myself out of working.

Well, I’m back from death’s door, so that’s a good thing; the mystery bug seems to have moved out to friendlier environs. Got the tiniest bit of prep work done for the one class I know I’m teaching, so while I still don’t know what-all I’m doing this semester, at least I’m not pretending it hasn’t started. Watched an awesome Samurai quasi-parody movie last night, called Kill!–with exclamation point, so you know it’s gotta be good. Though the DVR screwed up, so out of a 115 minute movie it turned out we had recorded exactly 102 minutes. Yep. I’m sure the last 13 minutes didn’t, you know, completely wrap up the loose ends or anything. Gospel Bob’s blog has been temporarily removed from my blogroll, while I explain the meaning of “anonymity” to him. Oh wait–he’s sitting next to me on the couch with his own laptop, and I think he just deleted the offending post whole hog. (Whole hog? Ewww.) So he gets to be on the blogroll again. And um….GB’s ma is in town, so we spent most of the day wandering Downtown City somewhat aimlessly, drinking coffee and cursing tourists. Not GB’s mom, of course–she’s not the tourist I was cursing–but the other 9,999 tourists on the same street. And…

Oh, we saw the Corpse Bride! (Well, that one doesn’t come with the exclamation point, but it deserves one.) Damn–I love Tim Burton. And my stalkerish Johnny Depp love is pretty well documented. And I’ll admit to some puppet-Depp love–though not in a freaky way. I’m not into the puppet love overall. I used to categorize fetish porn for a living, so I have very well-defined preferences by now.

Speaking of movies I’m geeky about…Taz asked me in a comment the other day if I’m getting ready to go see Serenity, seeing as how I’ve admitted to being a sci-fi Whedonverse geek. The answer is, in fact, I’m not, because…I’ve already seen it. In April. I got passes to one of the sneak previews, and took GB for our anniversary. (Actually, it was really awesome; I didn’t tell him about it, and counted on his hermit-like rejection of all NPR-media and the outside world to ensure that he wouldn’t know about the sneak previews at all. And it totally worked; we were in the theater, in line, waiting to go in, surrounded by people in Buffy and Angel shirts (and the occasional Serenity/Browncoats shirt), by the time GB finally said “Hey….I think I know what we’re seeing!” Best. Surprise gift. Ever.)

So. Not only have I seen it, I bought these for GB’s birthday (I preordered the set of 4 for a pretty good price. I’m a geek, but I’m a poor geek.) And then we helped the Wrangler move into his new apartment, and he didn’t know about GB’s Serenity figures, and he bought me the Jayne figure as a thank you gift. So in my house right now you might find: 5 Serenity action figures; the entire Firefly series on DVD (as well as all the Buffys and Angels, but I’ve already told you enough); and 2 Serenity promotional keychains, one of which is in my pocket right now.
I think I’ve said enough. This may present a geekier persona than I was going for. I’m going to have to post a super-cool one next time.

Good news: I’m not *just* a lush. My “hangover” from yesterday is persisting into today, so this has not simply been a case of not being able to hold my wine now that I’m getting O-L-D.

Bad news: See above. I’m sick. Lots of–um–divesting of stomach contents yesterday. Went to bed early, woke up still nauseous and with stomach cramps. And with a black tongue. Naturally the hypochondriac in me (aka “me”) immediately starts with the “ohmygod you’re dying! You’re bleeding from the esophagus! Or the stomach! Or the spleen! AAAAAAGH!” But no. It brushed off, and a quick Google search informed me that chewing Pepto Bismol tablets + mouthwash = black tongue in the morning. Whoda thought?

Ug. Ug. My stomach hurts. Ow. Must nap.

These aren’t symptoms of bird flu, are they? How about anthrax? Plague? Scabies? Gout? Or just a good-old-fashioned stomach virus….

So last night I went to the Department Gathering and, as usual, took it upon myself to remind everyone why I’m the department lush. It doesn’t help that my advisor’s mantra is “everyone should drink more,” or that three different sets of people were dispatched to “buy lots more wine,” or, for that matter, that my initial bonding with Advisor occurred over lots and lots of wine and cigarettes. I don’t smoke anymore–a fact which Advisor reminded me of several times last night, somewhat wistfully: “this is the point where you and I would go outside and smoke. I mean, it’s good that you don’t smoke. But it’s too bad we’re not smoking.” [and it’s a tossup whether I find that annoying or endearing or lots of both]–so all I’m left with is the wine. Which I drank. And drank. So much that by the end of the gathering I was insisting to Advisor and School Friend (also an ex-smoker like me) that we *must* start smoking cigars at these meetings. We must! We will! I will supply the cigars! No, really, it’s a [hic] GREAT IDEA!

Okay. So you see kind of how that went. And the thing is, I knew that last night was Date Night with Gospel Bob. So upon seeing my sorry state at the beginning of our date, GB did the only sensible thing: he grabbed the jug of Rossi and attempted to catch up.

But, oh, I had such a head start. There is no catching me! Mwahaha! And so there was drinking and records and, suddenly, the realization that GB simply must start his own blog! Now! Because the only thing more satisfying than drunken blogging is enabling drunken blogging!

–And *that’s* why this blog is anonymous.–

Of course, in the harsh light of Thursday morning, GB realized that he doesn’t even open his mail, fer chrissakes, and has no intention of ever posting to the drunken blog again. So I’m not sure if I should link right to it….but….I did drunkenly put it in my drunken blogroll, and since he knows I did that, well, look over there. –>

And then I went to attend the lecture of the course in which I am the Head Assistant Honcho, and spent the entirety of the hour and a half silently begging my stomach to pleasepleasepleaseIswearI’llquitdrinking not, um, divest itself of its contents. And trying to quell a rising panic attack, and I almost never get panic attacks–except when I drink *to the point of poisoning my body* and my body says, hey, fuck you buddy.

Which I deserved. And I did not puke in class, or on the train ride home, so thank heaven for small favors, right?

I think we’re going to have to move Date Night to the weekend.

Saw this at Profgrrrrl‘s, and it seemed like a fun diversion. (Notice how I haven’t updated my to do list in a few days? Think there’s a reason for that? There is. It’s not much different.)

Anyway. Here:

1. Go into your archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.

“And then some tequila, and some really excellent subs, and then a walk in the park.”

How incredibly excellent. That sounds like a perfect day. Wait–I mean, that *was* a perfect day, and can I have another like that soon?

And okay, fine, I’m enough of a sci-fi/paranoid hippie geek to ask: does anyone else think the 23/5 structure smacks just a bit of a Wilsonian Illuminati/23 conspiracy kind of thing? No? Just me? Must be the Discordian-geek still hunkered down in me. Ah, my misspent youth.

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