You know all those stay-put-H vibes that y’all have been sending for the past few weeks? They were greatly appreciated, and I’m thrilled that (with all y’all’s help, of course) we’ve gotten H. to full term.

But you can stop sending the stay-put-H vibes now. I’m ready for an outside baby.

Over the weekend I was pretty sure things were starting up. I was having contractions that were totally different than what I’d been having before, and I just felt…weird. But after a couple of hours the contractions stopped. We’re calling it prelabor, because “false labor” is just far too depressing.

I just got back from the doctor, where I learned that progress is being made on the effacement front, and H.’s head is “engaged,” which is good, I suppose. (Although it also explains why going from a sitting to standing position has become excruciatingly painful.) On the dilating front, though, not so much of the progress (like, none, really). Yes, I know i’m not quite 38 weeks, even, but all that prelabor crap really fucked with my expectations for when H. would be arriving. And I am feeling discouraged, and exhausted, and done.

I’m trying to remind myself that we *are* making progress, albeit slowly. And I want H. to stay in there as long as he needs to (within reason). But I’m officially over resting-while-I-can, and enjoying-this-time, and dreading-the-unknown.

So now I’m not quite sure what to hope for in the immediate future, but I think it’s getting close to something like bring-on-the-baby.

Advertisements