Remember that Onion article, “Area man always nostalgic for four years ago“? The first time I saw that, I didn’t even find it funny. It hit a little too close to home.

Yes, I know that the whole time I lived on the East Coast I missed California. And I have missed the East Coast terribly since I’ve been back here. It’s the people, of course, that I miss….but it’s always so hard for me to just appreciate whatever there is to appreciate about wherever I’m at.

Anyway. I’ve been in a funk today. GB went to a day-long seminar to help with studying for the Bar, and he’s not home yet. He’s been working a ton and studying like crazy, and I’ve been trying to work and feeling all lonely and shit. I’ve spent a lot of today puttering around the house and online, feeling all out of sorts.

So this text message I just got from Jason–“Stones, basement, bumper pool, snow storm, ganja, wine”–actually made me a little teary. Holy fuck, what I wouldn’t give to be playing bumper pool and drinking wine with Jason and Bad Idea and the Squirrel and listening to the Stones in a snowstorm. Fucking hell. I miss that so bad it hurts.

It’s not exactly that I think I’ve made bad decisions. I think that, in the long run, I’ll probably be happy with the enormous, radically life-changing decisions we’ve made in the past seven months.

But it’s kind of hard to see that right now, sometimes.

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