So, according to my new schedule (created for me by Gospel Bob, who took pity on me when he realized that I was serious about having No. Fucking. Idea. how to schedule my time this semester), today was a dissertation day, all day.* I woke up freaking out about this; I haven’t written anything–nothing!–in longer-than-I’m-going-to-tell you. And I have to present a chapter next month at the Big Scary Colloquium, and do I have a chapter to present? No. No, I don’t. So yeah. Freaking out commenced.
Luckily, I have these mountains of data I’ve collected and haven’t even begun to really analyze, so I had some productive procrastination to work on. And then I sucked it up and bit the bullet and probably one or two other cliches, and I tried to write something/anything.
So here is my Ta-Da! List, of what I did today:
- Coded and (more importantly) read a TON of fieldnotes/documents/random assorted data. I really have been thinking that I have months of fieldwork ahead of me, that I haven’t done nearly enough yet…but I have to say, I have more than I thought I did. I’m wondering, actually, if it might be possible to take that huge chunk of stuff I haven’t done yet and call that my NEXT project…and not include it here. Wish I could give y’all specifics, but let’s just say that maybe I can actually wrap up the fieldwork pretty damn soon…
- Wrote ONE PAGE of the dissertation.
- Did you hear me? ONE. PAGE. Go me! I was utterly terrified to write a word, and I just kept staring at that 100+ pages of notes/drafts/crap and wondering how to even approach it. And today I buckled down (I knew there were more cliches) and wrote something. Okay, it’s not a chapter, and I’m pretty sure it’s absolute crap, and I still have 99+ pages of notes to sort through (not counting fieldnotes–I mean just scribbly outline for the chapter), but I wrote something.
- Um, um, um, I fed the cats.
- I *did not* waste a million hours on blogs (sorry, blogfriends…I hope to be a better commenter again someday). I *did not* answer the phone, until about an hour ago. I *did not* put more songs on my NEW IPOD!. I *did not* nap, despite every fiber of my being trying to convince me that was a good idea.
I am clearly looking for affirmations that I don’t suck, in case that hasn’t been clear.
*I know that every single piece of advice everywhere says to write a little bit every day and not do big marathon sessions, but that has not been working for me. Well, the working-at-all hasn’t been working for me. I need at least a few marathon days to kickstart things, I think.