Seriously, y’all, who (besides me, unfortunately) would have guessed that the Squirrel would start sleeping with the SoapStar?

This is a very unfortunate turn of events. Actually, it’s un-freaking-believable. How is the SoapStar everywhere I want to be?

I hung out with the Squirrel in the kitchen for a long time tonight, talking and listening to sadder music than the living room crowd was ready for. And there was the usual vibe, and I was enjoying the Squirrel asking me to hang out in the kitchen with him, and then the SoapStar showed up…and Jason could simply not contain himself, and worked altogether too hard to try to tell me–through various bizarre codes and secret languages–what was going on with the Squirrel and the SoapStar.

Sigh. Yes, I remember getting married last week. And I know that the single people, they will continue to do what they do, and not *everything* in the world is about me. But seriously. Just when my focus shifts from Bad Idea to the Squirrel…well, it’s bad timing, is all. For me.

Yes. I do, in fact, expect everyone to sit around and wait for me to figure out what I want from them. Not saying this is my most stellar trait. But it’s consistent.