Okay. Here’s the deal. I don’t like bugs. Period. So anything bug-related just freaks me out.

Last weekend I was in Texas. Yes, I know that’s information I’m not supposed to give you, but it’s a big state, and I think being in Texas might be relevant here.

Anyway, I was out in a field helping put up a screen pavilion thing, and the person I was with said “Hey, you’re on an anthill!”, so of course I leapt into the air and off the anthill damn quick. Not quite quick enough, though, as my ankles and shoes were covered with the little fuckers. It took a minute to get them all off (OK, I just poured water over my feet and shoes until they were all DROWNED! HAHAHAHA!), and I got a couple of noticeable bites in the meantime, but I don’t think they were fire ants–the bites were a little painful, but not the OH MY GOD OW OW OW of fire ant bites.

OK. A couple of the bites got a little pimply looking, but a week passed and I didn’t think much about them. Until about three days ago, when my ankles erupted in an agony of itching. What the fuck? So I did a little scratching of the ankles, and now I have little bumps–like *more* bites–all over my ankles, and my toes, and in places I don’t think I had bites before. And they won’t itch for a while, then one will start to itch, then I’m pretty much doomed to an hour of manically scratching and flailing around.

What the hell did they do to me? I’m trying to convince myself that millions of ants are not going to burst through my skin any second. But why would my ankles itch NOW, 9 days after the fact?

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