Hold on, I’m going to go make myself a drink.
…
Okay, I’m back. Vanilla vodka and flat Coke, but I haven’t had a drink in a while, and it’s close enough for rock ‘n’ roll. (Thanks to BrightStar for what may become my catchphrase.)

So I’m wasting time tonight, feeling the pull of the semester beginning but not feeling entirely ready to be pulled into it. High procrastination mode. So anyway, I was over at RussianViolets‘ and saw that she’d done the “7 things that surprise my friends” list. Now, I’ve seen this around a bit in the past couple days, and while I generally jump on this kind of thing, I obviously haven’t. It just seems a little…vulnerable. But whatever. I’m here, I’m wasting time, so I’ll give it a shot. I’m not promising anything.

OK. Seven things about me that surprise my friends:

1) Like RussianViolets, Profgrrrrl, and Adjunct Kait, I was a painfully shy child. That phrase, “painfully shy”? It’s really not just a figure of speech. But here’s the part that my friends all seem to find surprising: I’m a painfully shy adult as well. Like most of us introverts who’ve chosen semi-extroverted jobs, though, I’ve learned to hide it pretty well, and most people who’ve met me in the past 10 years would say I’m pretty outgoing, I think. That is so, so, so not true.

2) I’m almost positive that whenever anyone says complimentary things about my appearance, personality, or actions (really anything not related to my brain), they’re just being polite.
2a) I don’t really believe anyone is *that* polite, but I might be *that* fucked up.

3) I got married when I was 16. This floors ’em all. FYI: No, not arranged, though my Middle Eastern father was a factor; yes, parental consent; 7 years older; for 3 years, followed by a very amicable dissolution; yes, big huge fancy long-dress wedding; no regrets, since that’s where I learned nearly everything I love about rock ‘n roll.

4) I was afraid of the dark until I was almost 12. This may have helped with my current superhero-like ability to sleep in absolutely any lighting.

5) I absolutely hate having intellectual debates about my field. My standby line: If you want to have this conversation, you need to pay me.

6) Neither I nor any living person in my family (besides my father) knows my father’s real age, and it’s likely we never will.

7) I am a big, huge, sappy softie, but hardly anyone breaks through my hard candy shell to figure that out. This is true emotionally, of course, but it’s extra-true physically. I will never make the first move to hug, cuddle, or touch my friends, so just go ahead and do it already.

Ooh, not drinking in a while + drinking fast while blogging = I feel lovely. That was actually kind of cathartic. Think I’ll have another drink and call it a (completely unproductive) night.